Lt. Vincent Hanna

I feel as though I may have overstated my point the other day... I actually do like Al Pacino as an actor in a fair number of movies, and I hope you didn't mistake my playful ribbing of his method as outright aggression. As such, I want to allow Al to respond here in print - albeit in character, apparently. I believe he chose Lt. Vincent Hanna from the gritty crime drama Heat... Nice choice, right? Without further ado, here is an excerpt from my interview with Al Pacino (FYI, the rest was unintelligible):

Me: Thanks for joining us, Al. I guess I've always wondered-
Al: Don't waste MY MUTHERFU@&ing time!!

Me: Oh. Um... What would you say-
Al: Gimme ALL YOU GOT!! GIMME ALL YOU GOT!

Me: Heat is one of my favorite movies - what was your inspiration for the Vin-
Al: Well I am... over-fu@&in' whelmed. What d'you want for that, a junior g-man badge?

Me: Uh, no. I'm good. But your character, Vincent Hanna - there was a lot of... angst built into him. Where did it come from?
Al: I gotta hold on to my angst. I preserve it because I need it. It keeps me sharp, on the edge, where I gotta be.

Me: Um, definitely. Me too. Totally.       What about behind the scenes? Did Michael Mann, the director, arrange for any real-life homicide detectives to consult with you on the picture?
Al: Us. The L-A-P-D. Po-lice Department... We just got made.

Me: Made what?
Al: [silence]

Me: [contemplating] What about Val Kilmer? How was it working with him? Tom Cruise has been quoted saying Val was-
Al: Cause she's got a great ass... and you got your head all the way up it!

Me: She? Val Kilmer is a man. You know that right?
Al: Ferocious, aren't I? When I think of asses, a woman's ass, something comes out of me.

Me: Ok. But Val Kilmer is definitely a man. I know his name is gender-neutral, and his hair is kind of long in the movie, but still... Definitely a man.     Did something happen between you?
Al: [Singing] By the time I get to Phoenix, we'll be rising. She'll probably leave a note right on the door.

Me: What does that mean? Is Val Kilmer gay? Why are you singing?
Al: Albert, what's wrong with you? You drag me here, waste my time like this.

Me: Who's Albert? Why are you calling me Albert?
Al: Who? Who? What are you, a fu@&ing owl?

Me: That seems a little out of line. Why don't you-
Al: Empathy was yesterday. Today, you're wasting my motherfu@&ing time.

Me: I was just-
Al: This is my operation, I have tactical command that supercedes your rank...

Me: What rank?! I was just saying-
Al: I'm angry. I'm very angry, Ralph. You know, you can ball my wife if she wants you to. You can lounge around here on her sofa, in her ex-husband's dead-tech, post-modernistic bullshit house if you want to. But you do not get to watch my fu@&ing television set!

Me: [scared for life]
Al: You know, we are sitting here, you and I, like a couple of regular fellas. You do what you do, and I do what I gotta do. And now that we've been face to face, if I'm there and I gotta put you away, I won't like it. But I tell you, if it's between you and some poor bastard whose wife you're gonna turn into a widow, brother, you are going down.

Me: [meekly, still very scared] I'm sorry I implied you might be gay partners with Val Kilmer...
 
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